Monthly Archives: August 2012

Bad Timing

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Filed under Animation, Comics, Toons, Memes

The Youngest Customers

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Filed under Advertising & Commercials

Cinderella – Gypsy Road

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Filed under 1980s, Music

Carlton Draught – Beer Chase! (Fantastic and funny advert)

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Filed under Advertising & Commercials, Best of Bugloaf

Dave Brubeck Quartet – Take Five (Belgium, 1964)

A good way to zen into a Thursday morning.

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Filed under Music

Don’t Buy This

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Filed under WTF

Five Men Standing Below a Nuclear Blast

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Filed under Military & Police

Do Rats Laugh?

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Filed under Aww (Moments of Zen)

MEOW by Cyriak (NSFW for cartoon cat carnage)

I figured that since I’m spotting Halloween stuff in various stores already, I could post a spooky video. I’ve posted it sometime before, perhaps several times, but it’s just fantastic.

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Filed under Animation, Comics, Toons, Memes

Jumpman – A Five-Year Timelapse Look at How One Guy Does His Hair

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Filed under WTF

Twin Baby Dancers (cute of the day)

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Filed under Aww (Moments of Zen)

Better Names for Things, or Target Label Reinterpretation

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Filed under Fails, Wins, Pranks, and Puns

Koala Visits a Canoe

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Filed under Animals & Nature

Wouldn’t It Be Funny If They Built a Hotel Here?

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Filed under signs, cards & quotes

404

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Filed under signs, cards & quotes

FML

I hate life. I know this is absurd, because all there is IS life. But I hate it. I’m an American, the most privileged people on the planet, born with a silver spoon up our asses, given everything, and the work we have to do isn’t exactly life or death, at least for most of us. But I hate this. I don’t know why I hate this, but I do. I hate life. I hate all this AWARENESS, knowing right from wrong, being outside the Matrix, bah, it’s all crap.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s all better than the alternatives. The two most likely versions of the after-death, in my uneducated American opinion, are either a never-ending family reunion, or nothingness. Let’s look at the first option, and my personal reflections. My parents divorced when I was 9 years old. After a few years of struggle, my Mom valiantly decided that living in her mother’s (my grandmother’s) walk-out basement was a more viable solution than living on the streets. Life wasn’t too bad, for the most part. Except when it came to family reunions. Suddenly 50-90 people were invading my house, and after a couple hours I would hide away in my bedroom with my cats, waiting for everyone to just disappear. So, for me, a family reunion is crap. I’m not looking forward to seeing relatives that died many years ago, because my youthful impressions of these people are much better than the adult impressions I will form of these people. My grandfathers both died before I was 10 years old, and I still hold them both in very high regard. I have learned from my parents and their siblings that my grandfathers were both flawed. My Dad’s Dad was anti-social and a bit of a jerk, giving family members the silent treatment for days at a time. My Mom’s Dad was probably alcoholic. And both smoked heavily, hand-rolled cigarettes and cigars/pipes respectively. (And both died of lung cancer, which is why I don’t smoke.) All in all, I’d rather have a jolly version of my grandfathers than to learn the truth first-hand, and realize they’re both dicks.

The other option, nothingness, is actually more preferable to me than the whole family reunion, mostly because I won’t freaking care. I won’t have to deal with my family, I can just be…nothing. And I won’t even know it. It’ll be great. I can’t wait to just be nothing. I’m not going to expedite the process, but I think nothing is definitely the way to go. I won’t be relaxed, I won’t be asleep, but I’ll just be zero, zilch, an ex-person.

Maybe all this is coming up because it’s election season, and I start to hate life around this time every four years. I hate the fact that my political views tend to clash in some way with everyone I know. And I care less about this than almost everyone I talk to on a regular basis, and a lot of those I don’t speak with. Because of this, everyone, to some extent, pisses me off.

Which is why my wife (the one person who doesn’t usually piss me off) and I are taking a cruise. Or trying to organize it to take one. We still haven’t decided for sure, but it’s almost a sure-thing that we’re going. Or not. I don’t know, but probably yes.

I used to hate the idea of cruises. A vacation, to 20-year-old me, meant awakenings, new experiences, getting away from civilization, rediscovering what it meant to be a part of the world. My first real vacation, to Hawaii, was a disaster, and helped to kill my first real relationship with Laura from Minnesota. (We were totally incompatible, so the relationship was doomed anyhow, but the vacation helped to expedite the doom 6 months or more.) I was still in the mindset that we needed to really EXPERIENCE Hawaii. She wanted to do all the tourist-y stuff. So we did all the tourist-y stuff. and I had a lot of fun. But I didn’t want to have fun doing that stuff, I wanted to have fun just relaxing on a beach, or wandering into a rain forest, just being zen with the world, and maybe learning how to surf.

Now, at age 36, I just don’t care. I just want to be one of the masses, the Sheeple. and let a cruise director dicate my plans. Sure, I can choose from a list of shore-expeditions, like snorkeling or shopping at some rustic-yet-overpriced gazette filled with crappy shirts, hats, and other souvenirs of the local populace. But there’s a specific list of stuff to do. I won’t be visiting the local slums and seeing how the populace actually lives. I’ll be sticking to the shores, with a cruise representative around at all times, until such time we need to board the ship, where I can renew my perma-buzz with boat drinks for days on end, until we reach Puerto Baltimore and I have to return to daily life once again. I don’t want to know myself, to find myself in some other locale. I just want to be stupid and have fun. Until I die, in some means or another.

But this is all crap. I wouldn’t even have written any of this if I really felt this way. I just don’t want the strain of life to weigh down as much as it does. Everything feels 10 times tougher than it actually is. In the past two months, I’ve just sort of reached my limit, and I need some sort of release. I just wish I could find myself at the same time, and live in the world, instead of watching from the sidelines.

I just wish life wasn’t so freaking…life-y.

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Filed under Blogsmith Commentary

The 1980s

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Filed under 1980s

Guillaume de Machaut – “Je vivroie liement/Liement me deport”

This was a monster hit song when it came out. Towns all over Europe were playing it.

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Filed under History, Music

74 Bands

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Filed under Music

What Do You Do If You’re Choking, And Alone?

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Filed under PSAs

Any Plane Crash You Can Walk Away From…

Although one of the fellas didn’t exactly walk away, everyone survived and made a full recovery.

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Filed under WTF

Hey

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Filed under Animals & Nature

Hard Wipeout

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Filed under Explosions, Crashes, Destruction, and Stunts

A Great New NIKE Ad

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Filed under Advertising & Commercials

Jump, boys!

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Filed under Art

Brad Neely – George Washington (NSFW lyrics)

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Filed under Best of Bugloaf, History

…but you keep it all inside.

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Filed under 1990s, Movies & TV

Fake Celebrity Pranks Times Square

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Filed under Fails, Wins, Pranks, and Puns

Patrick Warburton as Cal Johnson

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Filed under Best of Bugloaf, Movies & TV, Music

Hipster Advertisement (with an pleasant twist ending)

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Filed under Advertising & Commercials

Achievements Cheat Code

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Filed under Best of Bugloaf, Fails, Wins, Pranks, and Puns

A Great Jerry Springer Moment

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Filed under Best of Bugloaf, Movies & TV, WTF

Irish Step Dancing for Beginners

The fact that the teacher is really cute had absolutely nothing to do with my posting something on Irish something or other.

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Filed under Europe, Geography, Sports & Exercise

Pug Knight

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Filed under Animals & Nature, Movies & TV, Star Wars

Mustache.

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Filed under Fails, Wins, Pranks, and Puns, Movies & TV

Amazon Yesterday Shipping

via Neatorama.

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Filed under Advertising & Commercials

Pic Dump

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Filed under 1_Link / Picture Dump

“I’m not quite dead yet!”

I found this over at Bits and Pieces earlier. In the title, I’m referencing the very quotable Monty Python and The Holy Grail:

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Filed under WTF

Not So Secret Weapon

See, he’s got a gun attached to the back side of his blade.

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Filed under History

Some Links

A cool way to display PEZ dispensers

TV Hat – Watch movies on your iPod or iPhone with a dorky hat. That being said, I’m getting one, since I hate holding up my iPod. I just won’t wear it in public.

Popeye’s Last Supper

The Agent Coulson Avengers poster

Watch classic cartoons

Thirty-Nine Inspiring Road Trips

A notebook with wonky lines

Mac Aquarium step-by-step

Family tree of the Greek gods

Internet Explorer Error design-generator…it’s hard to explain. It’s simple to play with, just check it out.

Joel McHale briefly explaining the naked pool game on Community

A seventh-grader mimicked nature in order to improve solar collectors’ performance

I was born in a factory. (A funny story from The New Yorker)

Deconstructing the first chord of “A Hard Day’s Night” (via 22 words)

Clean up your mess: a short, easy guide to Graphic Design, for EVERYONE

Carl Weathers’ creepy “Change Is Beautiful” ads

A possible inspiration for Batman

Twelve things to know if you are falsely accused

Reddit topic: How accurate is medieval music from TV and movies? (…and some examples of Medieval Music’s Greatest Hits)

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Filed under 1_Link / Picture Dump